[The following is a partial transcript from the third and final debate between Republican Presidential candidate George W. Bush and Democratic Candidate Al Gore:]
Jim Lehrer: Okay, gentlemen, you know the rules as established by the Commission of Presidential Debates. The questions will come from citizens in our audience. You have two minutes to answer each question; your opponent may then offer a rebuttal. I will then ask a follow-up question at my discretion. The next four questions pertain to At the Drive In, a rock music group from Governor Bush's home state of Texas. The first, to Governor Bush, will be asked by Clara Thompson. Where are you, Ms. Thompson? ...There you are.
Clara Thompson: Uh, yes, Mr. Bush. Do you think that At the Drive In's new album, Relationship of Command, matches the intensity of the band's live show?
George W. Bush: Thank you, Ms. Thompson. As Governor of Texas, I'm proud of these young men from El Paso. I take both young people and the arts very seriously, as I think my record shows. But, uh, the question here, really, is: who do you trust, and who do you think will get things done? I am a uniter, and not a divider. Also, you can't hear At the Drive In's afros on record.
Al Gore: I'm glad you asked this question, Ms. Thompson, because this is an area in which Mr. Bush and I differ. While no album can ever approximate the complexity of the live concert experience, the sonic intensity of Relationship of Command makes it a good second choice. Andy Wallace mixed the album, and if that name doesn't ring a bell, let me remind you that nine years ago, he mixed an album called Nevermind by a band called Nirvana. The punch his mix brings to these guitars is impressive. So, while Relationship of Command doesn't quite compare to seeing this group live, you'll surely want to mosh-dance in your bedroom when you listen to this recording.
Frank Lee: If you are elected president, what do you propose to do about the inconsistencies of Relationship of Command?
Al Gore: Well, yes, I do think this album is largely inconsistent. Right now, music is the most innovative it has ever been in the history of the universe. We have many, many options open to us in these times. Under the Clinton administration, we have brought music into a period of growth, of expansion, of limitlessness. But I'll tell you this: if you want a country filled with records like Relationship of Command that are light on memorable riffs from bands steeped in punk and 70's classic rock, [gestures to Bush] this... is your man.
George W. Bush: Creativity in music is up right now, yes. But rock music for pure rock purposes has suffered under the Clinton administration. They're trying to muck up our loud, old fashioned noise with their Washington politics and fuzzy math-rock. Now, these boys... the singing... either you love it or you hate it. But the important part is, it gets by. It gets by on a handful of truly catchy, anthemic rockers. "One Armed Scissor" is the most arena-ready of the songs on Relationship of Command. It has an infectious vocal hook. It has a punchy riff on the chorus. It gets into your subliminable mind, and it more than makes up for the quavering, affected vocalizing on the verses.
Jim Lehrer: The next question will be asked by Ms. Sandra Hartford, and is for you, Governor Bush. Ms. Hartford, where are you?
Sandra Hartford: Mr. Bush, do you feel At the Drive In frontman Cedric Bixler's vocals are in need of reform?
George W. Bush: I, uh... no. I think the man is very intense. And intensity is a great thing. If I am elected President, I can promise you, it will be very, very intense.
Al Gore: Ms. Hartford, I'm glad you asked this question because this is an area in which Mr. Bush and I differ. Intensity can be a great thing, but is not always. Cedric Bixler has two main vocal styles. Now, one of those is a punk rock bark that recalls Rage Against the Machine's Zack de la Rocha. The other is an operatic wail that resembles Ronnie James Dio. The self-conscious aggression of the de la Rocha bit is tiresome, I find, but the Dio channeling is odd and occasionally fun. Take "Sleepwalk Capsules," if you will, for example. In the song's chorus, he's in full-on metal god mode. You could even say his soaring pitch conjures the image of a youthful Tom Cruise sitting in the cockpit of an F-15 fighter. But under Governor Bush's plan, it would not. What he proposes is that we strip Tom Cruise naked, kill his family, burn his house and shoot down his fighter. Now, I see a time when--
Jim Lehrer: Then, on to the next question. This comes from Mr. Hannity Colmes and will be fielded by Vice President Gore.
Hannity Colmes: What song on Relationship of Command do you feel most encapsulates its strengths and weaknesses?
Al Gore: Definitely "Invalid Litter Dept." The slower passages of this song are really not what the American people need at this time, with its 80's metal guitar tone and know-it-all spoken word vocals. And honestly, you'll find yourself wanting to hate it. Tipper certainly hated it. But the chorus of the song is such a fist-pumping, singalong triumph you'll find yourself returning to it again and again. And that's really this album in a nutshell: alternately annoying and powerful.
George W. Bush: In the great state of Texas, we have a saying: people with afros should be shot. [gasping laugh] People need to have consequences for their afros, and that consequence is death. During my term as Governor, I've fried hundreds of men, and it wasn't always easy. You know, sometimes the switch jammed, or we'd get low on power or something. But I know one thing: there cannot be a harsh enough penalty for bad hair. Now, technically At the Drive In have not committed a crime, but what would you do if it was your hair? What would you do if your four year-old daughter came home from school, crying, with all them products dripping down her cheeks? I'm sure you'd want the maximum penalty implemented. I know I would...
