When critics strain to pigeonhole a piece of music that's vaguely funky in that sleazy 70s way, the words "porn soundtrack" are often put to use. The idea that the blue movies of the 70s had even marginally interesting soundtracks is, if you think about it, a rather odd bit of received wisdom. How many people have actually seen enough of these films to say? Perhaps it's just that 70s porn soundtracks and the now-classic music of the blaxploitation genre have become tangled up in people's minds somehow.
In 1975, Swedish songwriter and renaissance man Tom Zacharias recorded two concept albums so funky, so nasty, and in such overall bad taste, that counterpart skin flicks would've been mere redundancies. These records, titled Belinda and Belinda's Döttir, featured elastic rhythms, acid guitars, and catchy pop songs about kinky sex of the most extreme varieties. Sold primarily in porn shops, both were hits throughout Sweden. In an attempt to cross over to the American market, Zacharias recruited singers to add English vocals to a handful of the tunes and advertised the finished product via classifieds in the back pages of Hustler and Screw magazines. There were few takers, however, and Belinda never arrived in America.
This CD reissue collects the Belinda songs re-recorded in English; also aboard are the Swedish originals. The sound of this disc is immediately appealing. Zacharias had access to a good studio and used top-drawer session musicians; every last instrument and piece of gear used here would undoubtedly fetch top dollar in today's vintage market. The grizzled guitar filth is so very right, and the drums pop and reverberate with joy-- a joy the 80s might've destroyed forever. When Zacharias' band is at its funkiest, it makes the kind of sound The Beastie Boys longed so desperately to capture on their Check Your Head-era instrumentals. At the purely sonic level, Belinda is a major treat.
The songs themselves, though, present a mixed bag. I greatly prefer the Swedish versions because, in English, the lyrics are graphic and shocking in the most juvenile manner possible, distracting the listener from all other concerns. "Please Daddy" is sung from the perspective of a girl who wants to lay her father, and she's willing to allow Mom to join in. "Last Christmas," she sings, "I blew Santa Claus/ And the family that screws together grooves together." Another lyric offhandedly mentions sex with a 10-year-old. It's all theatrical and tongue-in-cheek, of course, but it's hard not to feel like an asshole listening to it.
But skip to the Swedish half of the album, and the groove goes guiltless in comparison. With the meaning of the words masked, Belinda becomes an enjoyable series of libidinous 70s pop tunes with tough beats. "Savinnan" sounds almost like Can, with a driving bass throb that the rubbery drummer clings to like a life preserver. "Gay Club" is acoustic and quieter but still danceable, stemming from some strain of music-hall tradition. Melodies seem drawn more from Northern European folk songs than the Western pop tradition, which lends an added degree of strangeness. This is not a great record by any means, but stick with Belinda's Swedish versions and you've got a pretty decent record for a rather indecent party.
